I feel you. My mother did exactly the same types of acts; I was expected to turn over any money I earned to her, she bullied me into quitting school at 16 to go to work to support the family, she "borrowed" money in later years. You're right, it's not your fault.
Wow, I very much needed this reminder today!! I could never do enough to satisfy my dad, and had thought I was to blame, until a similar experience in a church, about 30 years ago now!! God bless you for sharing this, and thank you for the reminder
I spent over 10 years of my life taking care of a multiple incest survivor (Mother Father Uncle same House plus neglect & abuse along with alcoholism and drug abuse by them).
I get it. One doesn't know what normal is even though one has a vague idea from friends school and media
You are not to blame in any way.
Stay strong. Your innate strength and intellect is what got you through it.
My husbands mother (my mother in law) is the cruellest woman I have ever met. Jill is now 74 and still to this day hates almost everybody she encounters, including me. I remember my husband Matt telling me early on in our marriage ( we have been married 24 years) how his mother very succinctly told him that when she was pregnant with him she “jumped off of the top step” onto her ‘belly' in an attempt to abort him as she hated the thought of having a baby, but he survived and she hated him for it.
She then got pregnant 2 years later with his brother Jason and, equally despised him, so much so, she would call him a runt ‘c’. She beat them daily with chains, would throw stones at them, when as little children they were so terrified of her they would climb the highest tree until there father got home from work, very late into the night, they were 5 and 7. The misery she inflicted upon these 2 boys to me is incomprehensible, she was, and is, devoid of any natural affection. As a Christian I have found this a challenge to understand, Ive questioned God many times why she has lived a long life and Ive lost so may friends who were deserving of one and denied? Only a short week ago she said to our 20 year old son who visited her Christmas day that he was worthless and should be killed enraged me.
Im still sitting with that and have to justify that only a person mentally ill could be so unkind and cruel, ’surely’, no sane person could be so callous and evil.??
Your story really resonated with me, and I can see by Gods almighty grace you have shone above this terrible legacy that was bestowed upon you.
Thankyou for your story, I felt every hurt you went through.
I wonder how she has gotten away with her behaviour?
It is very common that they are so lovely towards other people (which is a smart strategy) so that no one believes the victims or they think they exaggerate.
My father died only 49 years old while she is living on, so I completely understand your questions.
I don’t have all answers but I know that God is just, and every one will receive a fair and righteous judgment from God one day.
I have also been thinking about how people can be so evil, and have come to the conclusion that some people just are.
I have never thought about why I had to go through things, but I know God cares for me.
Andrea Crouch wrote a song and it says:
But in every situation
God gave me blessed consolation
That my trials come to only make me strong
Here is a link to the song if you want to hear the rest of it:
I empathize with that girl! I to was raised by a psychopath who married a bipolar narcissist! I’m happy to know you were told Not Your Fault at 16. I was much older.
We should never blame people or ourselves, The Human experience is absolutely about Enlightened Progression of learning who and what we are. That's what happens when your life is upside down and if that wasn't part of your experience you would not be who you are now.
...beside the point maybe, but MONEY is not a "THEM" or a "they". Money is a collective term, a tool if you will, and that makes it an "IT". The money was there... You put IT there. Your mom took IT out. Dollars can be singular or plural. I put the dollar down, someone picked it up. She put several dollars in front of me, I picked them all up. Sorry, I just had to say it.
And in the subject - my mom (and other family members)was a bigger nut than that. My greatest revenge has been in outliving them all.
I admire the spunk in your 16-year-old self who bravely stood up to a tyrant. You were blessed to have Heidi and her loving mother in your life.
Thank you.
I was always in a survival mode. I looked at my dad, and something in me just did not want to end up like him.
Heidi ( not her real name) helped me. She will come back in a later story.
I feel you. My mother did exactly the same types of acts; I was expected to turn over any money I earned to her, she bullied me into quitting school at 16 to go to work to support the family, she "borrowed" money in later years. You're right, it's not your fault.
Anytime good triumphs over evil is a good time to share it. God bless you for your strength and your faith in God.
Wow, I very much needed this reminder today!! I could never do enough to satisfy my dad, and had thought I was to blame, until a similar experience in a church, about 30 years ago now!! God bless you for sharing this, and thank you for the reminder
Thanks for sharing. I get it, and I needed to read that, actually, today is a great day to read that. ❣️✌️
I am sorry for what happened to you.
I spent over 10 years of my life taking care of a multiple incest survivor (Mother Father Uncle same House plus neglect & abuse along with alcoholism and drug abuse by them).
I get it. One doesn't know what normal is even though one has a vague idea from friends school and media
You are not to blame in any way.
Stay strong. Your innate strength and intellect is what got you through it.
Never forget but do not dwell on it.
Your stories are heart felt, interesting and so very relatable. Thank you Liv!
My husbands mother (my mother in law) is the cruellest woman I have ever met. Jill is now 74 and still to this day hates almost everybody she encounters, including me. I remember my husband Matt telling me early on in our marriage ( we have been married 24 years) how his mother very succinctly told him that when she was pregnant with him she “jumped off of the top step” onto her ‘belly' in an attempt to abort him as she hated the thought of having a baby, but he survived and she hated him for it.
She then got pregnant 2 years later with his brother Jason and, equally despised him, so much so, she would call him a runt ‘c’. She beat them daily with chains, would throw stones at them, when as little children they were so terrified of her they would climb the highest tree until there father got home from work, very late into the night, they were 5 and 7. The misery she inflicted upon these 2 boys to me is incomprehensible, she was, and is, devoid of any natural affection. As a Christian I have found this a challenge to understand, Ive questioned God many times why she has lived a long life and Ive lost so may friends who were deserving of one and denied? Only a short week ago she said to our 20 year old son who visited her Christmas day that he was worthless and should be killed enraged me.
Im still sitting with that and have to justify that only a person mentally ill could be so unkind and cruel, ’surely’, no sane person could be so callous and evil.??
Your story really resonated with me, and I can see by Gods almighty grace you have shone above this terrible legacy that was bestowed upon you.
Thankyou for your story, I felt every hurt you went through.
You are in my prayers. xx
Thank you for sharing. This really touched me.
I wonder how she has gotten away with her behaviour?
It is very common that they are so lovely towards other people (which is a smart strategy) so that no one believes the victims or they think they exaggerate.
My father died only 49 years old while she is living on, so I completely understand your questions.
I don’t have all answers but I know that God is just, and every one will receive a fair and righteous judgment from God one day.
I have also been thinking about how people can be so evil, and have come to the conclusion that some people just are.
I have never thought about why I had to go through things, but I know God cares for me.
Andrea Crouch wrote a song and it says:
But in every situation
God gave me blessed consolation
That my trials come to only make me strong
Here is a link to the song if you want to hear the rest of it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvIxwc90BEI
I’m so sorry you have this person in your life. Thank God she wasn’t your mother.
There’s no understanding someone like you’ve described.
I empathize with that girl! I to was raised by a psychopath who married a bipolar narcissist! I’m happy to know you were told Not Your Fault at 16. I was much older.
I can imagine how much you must have suffered. I hope your future will be much better.
We should never blame people or ourselves, The Human experience is absolutely about Enlightened Progression of learning who and what we are. That's what happens when your life is upside down and if that wasn't part of your experience you would not be who you are now.
Who is Karen? I missed an earlier segment.
...beside the point maybe, but MONEY is not a "THEM" or a "they". Money is a collective term, a tool if you will, and that makes it an "IT". The money was there... You put IT there. Your mom took IT out. Dollars can be singular or plural. I put the dollar down, someone picked it up. She put several dollars in front of me, I picked them all up. Sorry, I just had to say it.
And in the subject - my mom (and other family members)was a bigger nut than that. My greatest revenge has been in outliving them all.
I subscribed to her, and read it this morning. Loved it! Is it a true story?